Simplify or Beautify?

December 11 – 11 Things What are 11 things your life doesn’t need in 2011? How will you go about eliminating them? How will getting rid of these 11 things change your life? (Author: Sam Davidson)

I am going to struggle with staying true to this prompt. There are things, material and otherwise, that I most definitely need to get rid of... I think in some way these posts have already been full of them. Also, did I mention that I don't really like lists? [I was going to say *hate* but I realize that is a dramatic and extreme word that should be used sparingly ... and it has been springing from my lips regularly along with too many four lettered words since I have felt the crush of finals week upon me.]

I want to focus more on what I want to manifest.

I conceptualize it in this way. Several years ago, I moved across country with only what I could carry in my car. I handed over to many friends, some for safe-keeping and other for keeps, the worldly possessions that could not fit in my car (read, I didn't need them, they were unessential) but that I had special attachment to. I learned how to let go of material things ... and I have done a pretty good job of keeping myself clutter free since then.

[Aside: In fact, I am so good at de-cluttering that people ask me to help them. Mostly I just go over and talk them through letting go of things that they don't need, but sometimes, I actually do the sorting and sifting myself.]

Then a few years later, I looked around my sparsely furnished one bedroom, barely 400 sq feet, apartment and realized I didn't have anything up on the walls... nothing.

So, I started to decorate. It didn't fix anything in my life, but it made the place I came home to more welcoming, more like home. I loved that place, with all its imperfections, and I still miss it. I wonder some times if one of the things I miss is actually how I had made it homey.

Now I have been here for over a year and there is still nothing on my walls.

There is no welcoming part of my apt ... other than my turtle's space. I find her tank beautiful, with her little cave/sunning spot. When she gets up on the rock and does her turtle ballet in an attempt to get as much sun (or fake sun) to touch as much of her body as possible, I think she is happy ... if that is an emotion that turtle's feel, if turtle's feel emotion ... it is beautiful because I sense the security and warmth that moment holds for her. She may not feel them as emotions, but they are two sensations that rule her world, so I know she feels them in some way.

[I will try to capture a picture of this, but for now, just use your imagination]

I am busy ... trying to write a paper about how religious views impact the way people tell their life histories, no light work for me, so I am going to post this half done so that I can give it the thought it deserves.

These are the 11 things I want to manifest in 2011...
1. Self compassion.
2. Patience with the universe and the beings with whom I share the world.
3. Self love. I really do believe that you can love others more when you love yourself. I really do!
4. Openness. Vulnerability. Tenderness. I want to practice what I preach!
5. Healthy lifestyle ... regular exercise, healthy, yummy food choices and appreciative self-concept of my body!
6. Lovable.
7. Gratitude for the abundance in my life.
8. Talented, gifted, full of trust in my abilities.
9.
10.
11.

[I cringe as I review the list so far; it seems so self-centered. But, how can I heal the world without healing myself? I am starting here, with me ... as I believe is all we can do.]

[Green, in honor of T, she is inspiring me today]