The Random Texter

She (?) thinks I am her cousin. Once she even sent me the "verifying" info...so and so is my dad, but I was too annoyed to register the data.

She sends me very elaborate forwards of chain texts. As if chain letters and emails were not enough of a scourge in the world, yes, there are chain texts.

I have always wondered at the phenomenon, but not that deeply, really. Generally, I just delete them. But, sometimes I save them to share with bar friends. My *cousin's* texts are very amusing. Sometimes they come with music and generally they are accompanied by pictures.

They are all very middle school girl sentimentality, though I should not generalize, I am sure middle school boys are also just as interested in these sentiments! I hope my *cousin* is in that age range.

Here is the most recent text... copied exactly from my phone. It is not the best one to date, just demonstrative of the genre:
9:51 pm FWD:FWD:FW:FWD:FWD:FWD: Fwd:FWD: Fwd:FWD:
Middle school couples: almost 96% of people marry their school sweethearts Because you opened this you will get kissed on Friday by the person you love or like & tomorrow will be the best day of your life.Do not break this chain. You have 2 minutes this is not a fake...apparently...Forward this to 14 people in the next 10 minutes And you will have the best day of your life tomorrow. You're number one crush will either KISS,ask u out, or call u.If u break this chain the little girl fromThe Ring will be in your room tonight
[then there is a picture of a guy kissing a girl, looks like in a park]

I left in the typos and other conventions so that you can appreciate all the finer points of the genre. If only I could figure out how to post the picture.

I can't saw I really understand the need to send something to anyone that includes threats... there must be something that I am missing.

The threats, however, are often the part that gets these labeled "gems." They are often super intricate stories of mayhem, murder and privations... one I read to a friend, and she thought it sounded so real, with a name and all, that she googled it. Turns out it is a story that has already made its rounds around the internet (why does the spell checker want me to capitalize this word? Is it a proper noun because it is a virtual space in the world?).

I guess getting these texts proves that I am still part of the world even when I have not seen the outside of a book in days.

I get these from this *cousin* every so often... sometimes I respond with "Stop forwarding me these messages" -- and she responds an indignant "fine." Then a few weeks later, I get more... some evenings, and weekend mornings, I get a slew of them in a row.

Needless to say, I did not forward this to 14 people. I did not have the best day of my life today (I received the text yesterday) and the little girl from The Ring did not show up in my room last night. I didn't see The Ring, so I have no idea just how menacing that threat might have been. Tomorrow is Friday, though, so maybe I will get kissed or asked out or called?!