Secrets

I have a friend who trusts me with secrets. She doesn't just tell me secrets -- that is, our relationship is not based on me keeping her secrets. It is just that she trusts me enough to share parts of her life that she doesn't share (feels she can't share) with others.

It is, in a way, an honor.

But is also a burden.

She told me the last secret over a year ago -- and this time it included another dear person in my life. The person who introduced us in the first place.

Since then I have struggled with how to handle this other information and what it means to that other relationship.

I don't have an answer. But I made an effort to reach out to that other person recently because for the last year I have been avoiding contact.

It is an odd situation because all three of us live so far apart and communicate only three or four times a year anyway. But I knew she would feel the absence.

So I called her - and it was clear that she had noted my absence. I didn't lie about why I have been silent but I didn't tell her the whole truth.

That would need to be done in person and might mean a significant change in our relationship. And it would implicate others and I am not sure if I will ever be able to go there.