Stomping Grounds

Leading up to this trip, I had vague unsettling thoughts and dreams. It is odd how a place and memories can hold such sway and power in your mind.

Every other time I have been back, it has been for such a limited time. I was always able to contain the anxiety.

But I got off the dinky and felt just fine. I enjoyed the walk through town, cataloging new and old and altered.

It really didn't cross my mind to change the ticket to come for reunions. It would have been great to check it off the list so as to conserve dollars for Italy. It isn't the university that causes the anxiety anymore.

I bought and paid for my share of the orange and black years ago.

No, now it is the divorce and its aftermath that produces the anxious and nervous dreams. But I am sure that monster under the bed would shrink down to normal size if I actually met any of them on the street.

Truth be told, it is my own inner critic who conjures the scrutiny. She needs to get a better hobby.