Public Debates on Goodness

I walked into a computer lab this afternoon to print out my reading for class and inadvertently walked into what would become a heated debate. I wish I could remember the first snatch of the conversation I heard, but the gist was that it was important not to be too nice to people because they would always take advantage of you. Worse than that, taking help meant you were weak.

As I printed out packet after packet that I will never have enough time to read, I listened and participated in this fascinating conversation ... as we, eventually four strong, all made our cases for the goodness of people: that you could look for the good, or look for the bad and find either one... he rejected effort after effort, sometimes responded defensively as though by arguing for goodness we were somehow against HIM, but he did not leave.

Some plied him with compassion and understanding, others with calculated arguments (yes, modulated, theoretical, coherent arguments about love and the goodness of humanity), and he responded with his best negations of what we had to say --- but he also gave us glimpses of his soul.

What we saw was hurt and broken and very, very lonely.

We kept arguing for love, compassion, open-hearted-ness and goodness.

He kept insisting that EVIL lurks around every corner and it is just waiting to pounce on all of us -- and that the only thing that could make him feel secure is lots and lots of money.

I called him on his defensiveness and he acknowledge it as well as his sadness, but not his loneliness -- as though somehow his determination to be alone could blanket him from loneliness and pain. If you imagine that all you ever will be is hurt than you cannot be disappointed.

I could feel the whole in his heart -- and I told him that. Edwina kept offering him love, motherly love, that would envelope you and give you chicken soup and tuck you in -- so you could feel safe instead of wary.

He decided that we could part with an "agree to disagree" -- which we reluctantly accepted -- and he sheepishly took that big hug that Edwina had probably opened with over an hour before...