I have been told more than once that you can get more bees with honey than vinegar. It’s not that I doubt that might be true for some, but it has not always worked for me, especially in the most tense situations. Perhaps the issue is that I am not looking to attract bees, just to tame them.
Full disclosure: I use what I call “little girl voice” whenever necessary to get what I need. It works with those who want to “save” you – or those who are susceptible to helping. And, to be honest, it works with those who need to be the stronger, more powerful one. It is not exactly “baby bird” who behaves as though she were completely defenseless. Of course, if I tried to do baby bird with anyone who already knows me, I would be laughed off the planet. It is not a huge difference, but little girl just admits her needs, not that she needs all.
So, there I was in the second IEP with the usual suspects plus the regular teachers who had been put on notice that I wasn’t letting them off the hook. I was nice - to a point, that is to say, nice but firm. I wasn’t impolite – just direct, attentive and relentless.
I would feel bad about holding their feet to the fire if 1) the psychologist had bothered to learn my niece’s name; and 2) she had not brought the photocopy of “the law” complete with yellow highlights to back up her defense of the school district’s fuck up so many years ago. MAYBE ... that is, maybe I would feel bad if...
Yeah, I’m not afraid to be strong and smart and if that means not nice, so be it.
I am loaded for bear, so they are on notice.
[In case you didn't notice, these photos are largely unrelated. I took them while walking around downtown LA, that's the only tie in. But I enjoyed the juxtaposition of the news headlines with the evangelizing headlines!]