So... there are many more important stories to worry (or obsess) about in the news today, but these struck me as the most outrageous demonstrations of our whacky priorities:
T-ball Coach Pays Off Player to Hit Disabled Child
http://apnews.excite.com/article/20050715/D8BC2CTO0.html
Drunk Driver Mows Down Family near Border Crossing, Killing Two Children
http://apnews.excite.com/article/20050715/D8BBVQ400.html
12-Year Old Dies When Chased into Traffic
http://apnews.excite.com/article/20050715/D8BC1AP80.html
I know that I should spend more time worrying about getting my priorities straightened out, but maybe reflecting on the lack of perspective here will help me to get my perspective back.
The Dalai Lama has been talking about how one must replace anger with patience and tolerance. I agree in theory...but in practice, it doesn't feel like replacing. It feels like I am just ignoring the anger in the hope that it will go away. He warns about the dangerous recklessness possible when one allows herself to "express anger" as a way of moving beyond it. He says that anger is so prolific that it will just take over. So that means I really do have to replace the anger with patience and tolerance while still honoring my feelings... how is that done??? When the anger has been assumed, subsumed and ignored, it is fighting to get out in so many other ways. If it is not processed in anyway, just thrown out the window, then what??
Meds and Greens
2 days ago
Posts
The thing about about anger is that it represents vulnerability. To decide, to act from anger is to act from weakness. To reclaim power and perspective, you must release anger. Rather than denying the truth of emotion, it acknowledges that emotions are volatile and in process. It would be less beneficial to stay in anger, especially when it by definition is a distortion and an outward manifestation of our worst fears. It should be acknowledged, but never served...We are not imprisoned by our anger, unless we surrender to it. If we do, we are only detaching ourselves from others and the possibility of moving forward. We get angry, we don't have to stay that way. Perhaps the Dalai Lama is able to respond to anger with patience and understanding, because he realizes and wishes to share that it is a step rather than a destination...Acknowledge anger, then what...Surrendering and marinating in anger is like re-reading the first passages of a good mystery over and over again. It may be gratifying, but it can never be as satisfying as pushing through the suspense and uncertainty to find out whodunnit and what-happens-next...Perhaps the character you thought to be the culprit, isn't. Perhaps the conundrum unravels. The only way to know is to turn the pages and continue...
ReplyDeleteOn turning pages...
ReplyDeleteso right, so right... in this case, I am beginning to believe that the culprit is truly not who/what I thought. I have been focusing on the anger emotion only to find out when I look deeper that hurt is the culprit. By not wanting to be vulnerable or feel hurt, I am and have been hiding behind anger. So, I begin to delve into the pain to see if by acknowleding and feeling it, I might be able to release into tolerance and patience, with myself and others.
As always, your perspective is appreciated. It's good to know someone is reading this, and undertanding the subtext.