tumultuous

That is the best way to describe the state of my mind at the moment.

Sorry, you will get the brunt of it.

On the one hand, tired, still sore and plotting dinner because I have yet again managed to go a whole day without ONE proper meal. I have a big snickers bar in my purse that my sister gave me as a prize for running the marathon. Somehow it doesn't seem like either a proper meal or a healthy choice. Plus, I want WINE. As stated previously, it makes everything better.

I am irritated. I intended to be super motivated and just finish the damn drafts. Then something irritated me ... and I mean really irritated. I am not sure if it is just a clever way to get out of being motivated or if it requires attention.

I tried metta and it didn't really work... truthfully, I was too irritated to even get through it all... SUPER IRRITATED. Yes, I am yelling, on the inside. On the outside I am just sitting near the fireplace at sb and listening to TRAIN sing sweetly in my ears. Insides and outsides not matching yet again.

But, then, I remembered something that happened this weekend with The Mijo and it made me smile. Perhaps that is the ticket.

I am not hesitating or concentrating or farting ... all things he and I discussed this weekend. Oh, and maybe one of the best ones was when he asked me upon reaching the beach, "Why does there have to be so much sand?" Imagine the exasperated and irritated look on this 6 year old's face. "Actually, I am six and a half." Yeah, that's THE MIJO!

This is how he wanted me to take his picture on another beach day.