Let's see, the latest is that I didn't get the job. I am not going to lie, I was ambivalent about the job. It offered a kind of stability in terms of money and benefits, but it also felt very much like it could be a terrible idea.
I worried that I would fall back into the workaholic ... caped crusader like without too much effort.
Someday that might be a good idea, but right now it doesn't seem like it.
So, I feel very much like I am back at the starting line without much to show for the last six months, or even year. It is not as bleak as all that ... I know. I haven't really tried all the hard to get a job or figure out where to live. I have been hoping that magically the right job and place would make itself known as I paged through job descriptions and apartment listings.
Now that work will begin in earnest -- the one where I actually make decisions and commitments, even if they are not long term.
In the interim, I find that I have come far enough in this journey not to care about a lot of stuff. That sounds, and sometimes feels, a little dangerous. But what it looks like is that might parents say ridiculous things (or do ridiculous things) and rather than engage said actions or pronouncements in a logical way (that can lead to frustration or anger), I laugh at the ridiculous.
I name it in my head - ridiculous. I see the hilarity. And I laugh... because there is nothing I can do about it, and if I were looking at it from the outside, I would see the comedy.
So, I stood outside the crazy and laughed at it.
And then I went here:
And while I was there, I planned a sleep over at this hotel for my 50th. Stay tuned...
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