HWP WTF?

If you know me in real life, you know I don't really trade in text-speak. This is true even in texts, though, I do shorten words in order to get maximum content in 160 characters. [Shockingly, I think that renders me ready for twitter. I do not tweet. I fear if I were a bird I might also refuse to tweet if only to not be associated with the concept.]

Preamble rant aside, I have a purpose for the title. And, not coincidentally, it is another rant.

But the real purpose is this post is to declare the termination of the online dating experiment.

After the last first date, my reaction was "I deserve two free drinks for that one." (A friend encouraged me to stick with it by promising a drink for every first date; I was already up to four before this last one.). To be fair, it was not that bad.

It is just that I have so much to do and so little free time, it seems extra to spend it with people who misrepresent themselves. People who I have nothing in common with and who only want the company of somebody, anybody. 

I won't go into details...the anonymous may not always be innocent, but I still respect anonymity.

So, HWP.

It took me a long time to figure out what that meant. I wish someone would tell craiglisters that there is no character count on postings. There is no need for alphabet soup on the posting. Seriously.

This rant crosses my craigslist perusal with my okcup!d activity; and, in that way, it is not directed to any individual. Rather I just want to register my displeasure with both media and their attendant shortcomings.

HWP, for the uninitiated, means height weight proportional. This is, apparently, a desirable quality in women. It is listed by men in their myriad wants portrayed in symbolic fashion: ddf hwp 420 friendly nsa fwb etc.

It is, however, a mystery to me that any man could accurately recognize any woman as being height weight proportional.

Why is this a mystery?

Well, you see, when they imagine (this is a deliberate word choice) their body type, they invariably choose athletic, fit and, only occasionally, average. This never seems to take into account the mass hanging from their front-side sometimes affectionately referred to as the beer belly.

That is to say, if they think that a beer belly denotes athletic or fit in terms of body type, how might this affect their ability to decipher a woman's physique?  Or worse, what is it that imagine HWP to represent in a woman's physique? 

As my favorite character might intone, "the mind reels!"

Picture it for yourself and get back to me. The pictures in my head are not anatomically plausible without cosmetic surgery and an utter lack of food intake, if you get my drift.

The thing is...if you are going to meet someone someday, that person will see you.  So, are they lying? Or are they just unable to see body type in themselves even though they are body type obsessed when it comes to women?  Or is it that they don't get it at all, are unable to decipher body type, but feel they should ask for HWP because it's done?

I am confused.  And irritated.  And done with the obfuscation and hiding behind the screen.

I don't have a lot of time to meet people, but I am going to stick with live action from now on.  It's probably better in the long run to just face the fears of rejection head on ... just sayin.