Leadership is action, not position (a wise man once said, Donald McGannon, I think). Leaders must lead ALL including those who would not follow willingly. The good leader, or maybe just better leaders, do this fairly gracefully. These folks learn how to demand respect by behaving in a way that even the most unwilling cannot fault their leaders. Other leaders, perhaps those that perceive any leadership role as power and not responsibility, wield their leadership in such a way that engenders animosity, distrust and a sense of cog-ness. That is to say, that all workers are cogs to be replaced unceremoniously at the whim of their leaders or supervisors.
I have had the opportunity in my professional career to be an informal supervisor as well as a formal supervisor. It is often the case that one person is a sort of a natural leader of colleagues that emerges to steward a project, realignment or just in general keep the team moving forward. It is from these informal experiences that I learned most about leadership. I learned what it takes to rally the troops, organize team work and bring along the unwilling. I try to instill the sense of mutual self-interest whenever possible. Trying to convince all team members of the importance of the goal without a connection to the personal pay off is often a futile exercise. As this kind of leader, I discovered the importance of feeling integral as opposed to trying to get my colleagues to feel like replaceable cogs. I also gained experience building consensus around the idea of mutual self-interest. When everyone feels he/she has a stake in the end result, everyone is more willing to give it his/her all.
I have tried as a supervisor in the more formal setting to keep all of these lessons in mind. Mostly, I believe I have succeeded, however, I am not always proud of my leadership style. Like all people, I have bad days. I am short or impatient or just want to ask for what I want and get it. I can say, however, that I never felt the need to force anyone to quit because I didn't feel I could manage him/her. I took my job as the manager to mean that I was responsible for making my colleagues feel successful in their jobs. Watching others try to force out anyone who may not look favorably on a new manager has been very frustrating and disheartening to me. Why have I tried so hard to learn to be a good supervisor? If all one has to do is get rid of anyone who might not like you, why didn't I learn that lesson? Why do we allow inadequate, ineffective and incompetent people to have power?
Those are rhetorical questions that I hope will illustrate my frustration, but I am willing to listen to your thoughts on why this may be true.
As you begin, all leaders are different. So do they have different styles, motivations,a nd agendas. The leader who eliminates all dissent inevitably end sup leading no one. I'd suggest you instinctively resisted 'learning' that lesson because you don't wish to arrive at your destination alone. The leader who is too shortsighted to hear they maybe headed in the wrong direction is doomed to walk aimlessly, perhaps never reaching their destination at all.
ReplyDeleteDon't forget the big picture. We all want to be hugged and loved. It is important, right up there with food and water. But maybe we are not destined to be loved by those who we manage, lead, or direct. From them we must aspire to be respected. They may not like you all the time, but do they appreciate you and are they confident that you are committed to their best interest and that of the larger goal.
I decided to ride in the back of the metaphorical bus for awhile--and I didn't even know I had chosen to do so, smile-- and what I learned is that misunderstanding and isolation comes with the territory. Maybe it like the Doppler effect. As you project your message, your own self becomes distorted. That is why it is important to nurture yourself and preserve sustaining relationships. You must fill your personal needs elsewhere. And by doing so you set another good leadership model. So lead on, my dear. Take your knocks in stride. Heck, they didn't call me Mildred X for nothing. And once I got over my bruised ego, I realized how friggin funny that was-- and what a high compliment was hidden therein. Some people get pissed when you see around corners and do things they cannot, but deep down they realize they need and want you to step up. So step up. Because you can and therefore you must.